Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Day 4 : The bitchy day

Why Me GOD? Why Me?

I know I am not a teenager and I shouldn't care about what people will say or be embarrassed about who I am. I have studied well, I had an amazing job and now again studying in India's top management institute and working on my passion. But still I feel belittled when people laugh at me for being fat or feel embarrassed when gym instructor calls out my name(to inquire about my presence). I still feel like a plump kid who is made fun of by little monsters in the playground. I still feel that there is some internal joke of which I am butt of.
Had I been a teenager I would have cried but now I just respond by being equally savage and ruthless. I bitch about my life, I taunt people who make fun of me and shout at people whom I really care about.And on top of it I cant eat any comfort food like chocolates. I realize that it is kind of bad for health to fill up your insecurities but its so easy and comforting. The smooth melt of chocolate and caramel is electric; instantly all is well in the world again. And the vicious circle continues.

But this time it changes. I CHANGE.
If people make fun or laugh or say thingsabout me, I would try my level best to move on.........

12 comments:

  1. Trying one's level best to move on is half the battle.

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    1. I know its easier said then done... but that is the only way I will be at peace :)

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  2. moving on and tuning out the bullies is helpful to one's soul

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  3. Rise above! Hard to do and sometimes a little biting back never hurts ;)

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  4. A finely-etched piece of reality. And rather moving.

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  5. Having spent fifteen months of the last three years in India, I'd forego chocolate any day for the wondrous food of your country which I love second only to my own.

    I thoroughly enjoyed your writing but realize how difficult it is to endure the cruel comments of others, especially children. Good that you are aware of your tremendous accomplishments.

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    1. Thanks RNSANE for the encouragement. And you were forensic nurse... WoW!!! Is it as interesting as it is shown in American TV series???

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  6. We all feel that way now and then.

    Great use of the 3 words.

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